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Thursday, May 31, 2007

Well, hello Dolly

I'm feeling very grown up at the moment. And snotty still, but that's old news. I'm feeling grown up because I've gone from driving this:

car after

to driving this:

Dolly the car

Actually, it's not so much growing up, it's blanding down. Until we can get byrd to do something tasteful to it in muted metallics (think of a subtle Japanese woodcut print). Until then, it just murmurs Welcome to the Burbs, Ms Duck as it swooshes around corners.

I'm ashamed of how much I enjoy driving this car. It's an 8-year old Holden Commodore Acclaim (VTII, if you care), and it has pretty much every mod-con -- except that it has manual windows, which makes me very happy. Electric windows give me the willies. How hard is it to wind a window down, bejeezus? And it's an automatic. I lost the quest to find a manual car. Manual stationwagons under ten years old just don't exist anymore.

We do a lot of long-distance driving, which is why we've gone for the big car. It will be the first car we've owned that tall Best Beloved can sit straight up in, whilst stretching his lovely long legs comfortably. And the fact that it's a petrol guzzler has strengthened our resolve to ride our bikes as much as possible, even when it gets crazy cold.

In my family we name our vehicles. It's a bonding kinda thing. My first car was Hilda the VW Type 3, then came Poppy the red Laser, then SubyRuby the wonder car and now... Dolly.

We had a debate about the name on the way to picking up the car. Bumblebee wanted to name it after his latest girlyfriend, which I vetoed (after living with at least three animals called Monica at the same time when he had a thing for Monica Trapaga); I suggested Gracie (Grey-cie? geddit?) but Best Beloved said that he quite liked Gracie as a name and didn't want to waste it on a car. 'What', I quipped naughtily, 'saving it for your first-born? Let me know when you find the right woman for that one'. BB replied 'If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.' Do you know which 'philosopher' said that? Dolly Parton. And people think she's just a big pair of tits!, which is a reading from the gospel of David Brent, of course.

We all cracked up, and whilst laughing, agreed that Dolly was an excellent name for a car. A few more quotes, a bit of singing to educate Bumblebee on the wonders of Dolly, and a car was born.

Meanwhile, Subyruby has gone to live with a friend who hopes to do her up (and strip her back to bare metal! cool! It'll be like a bionicle!). She can presently be spotted lurking near the Sydney Writers' Festival. If you see her, give her a wave for me. I had a lump in my throat as she drove off, I must confess.

13 comments:

Mummy/Crit said...

OOh sad and happy at the same time/ I hope dolly brings you years of driving pleasure. I've been in auto suburbia for years now with the X-Trail...

Cozalcoatl said...

We bought a Subaru Outback stationwagon AWD, dull but a good drive for this area, desert and snow conditions. It all electric and auto which I don't like it but it works. It the biggest car I've ever owned but tiny compared to the behemoths here. There is a bright yellow Hummer a few streets away and everyone else seems to have F350's.
It personalised by bike racks and a Darwin Fish. All I need is a few Kangaroo stickers and we'll be sorted.
You don't need to have a front number plate on here. My Bro-In-Law is a Aussie aswell, and he has a old style NSW plate on the front of his ute. Not sure how legal that is but I want one.

Val said...

My, that IS a change.

I too dislike electrically operated windows, but manual ones in newer cars, even my 1999 Mazda, are hard to find. Hopefully yours in set up with the ability to operate the windows within a minute of turning off the engine. Otherwise, like me, you discover that you've left a window open (or you want to have it open while you sit in the car), then have to turn the engine back on...

But do enjoy the mod cons. Coincidentally, I recently posted photos of me and my first car (VW). That was fun to drive!

Anonymous said...

Did people used to hide when they saw you coming?

Ampersand Duck said...

Heh, maybe, but I never saw them, so they must have done a good job. She was the fidelity car -- you can't sneak around in a car like that. Not that we're planning anything naughty now...

Ampersand Duck said...

And onya Coz! Wear that Darwin sticker proudly. We were listening to someone on Radio National interviewing Ken wazzisname abut the new Creationist museum over there, and he was crowing that they have -- gasp -- FIVE PhDs on the staff. Hmm. My bro-in-law is apparently a PhD in Christian economics, which doesn't make him more credible in anything in my view. The idea of Christian economics makes me grumpy. But then unfortunately, is there any other kind in western culture?

Destructomeg said...

Although I only work in the buklding where the Writers' Festival offices are and not the actual events, I'll keep an eye out for her!

MrSnerg's 2005 Corolla has manual windows - it rocks!

Ampersand Duck said...

Ahem. Just want to reiterate, as I do occasionally, that I have nothing against Christianity. Just Christian fundamentalists.

As you were.

Anonymous said...

or just Christian economist fundamentalists with mail issues?

nice car!

genevieve said...

Must be car-buying season, we have done it too (and with something perfectly suited to adultery, from a fleet of hire cars I think. I am having trouble finding mine in the carparks.)Enjoy the silvery sleekness!!

We have bequeathed our more distinctive bright blue Falcon wagon to our young 'un, which is probably terrifying the neighbours as they see it backing cautiously down our rutted driveway with P plates (or winding sleepily back in at 5 am on Sunday mornings).

Cozalcoatl said...

I never had the urge to get a Darwin Fish in Oz, though both times with in a 8 year gap I've had a car in the US I've had a Darwin Fish....something in the water I tells ya.

Ken Ham is a Aussie, well at least Queenslander...Shame Australia Shame!

So what is Christian Economics? I'm actually curious.
The yearly budget of loafs and fishes? Best buys on stones for adulterers? Negative geared Brimstone?

Mindy said...

Hello Dolly! It's always hard leaving a loved car, but at least she has gone to a good home. I look forward to seeing what Byrd does with Dolly.

Anonymous said...

report from SubyRuby - I was much appreciated by the kids at La Perouse Public, attracted parking cops like bees to honey, turned heads in the CBD all week, & was incredibly well-behaved. Off to the mechanic tomorrow.