tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post116554256214421476..comments2023-11-01T00:38:49.400+11:00Comments on Ampersand Duck: Working through a few issuesAmpersand Duckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12245377686193859488noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165828818820262252006-12-11T20:20:00.000+11:002006-12-11T20:20:00.000+11:00And all these questions: I'm thinking about them a...And all these questions: I'm thinking about them all the time now. Helps me reading about people who do make motherwood work in a way that makes it seem less like a curse and more like a gift (like you.)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165828085311485202006-12-11T20:08:00.000+11:002006-12-11T20:08:00.000+11:00I'm glad to hear that you're on the mend Ducky and...I'm glad to hear that you're on the mend Ducky and I'm sorry that you've had such a rough trot of it the last little while.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165826548074675802006-12-11T19:42:00.000+11:002006-12-11T19:42:00.000+11:00ducky-dude,lordy, it's good to hear you're mending...ducky-dude,<BR/><BR/>lordy, it's good to hear you're mending :) <BR/><BR/>of course it will take time. it always does. and the head, heart, and lady-parts all heal at different rates, at different times, in different ways.<BR/><BR/>as for the body + mind = individual, well, yeah. I had a very capable body that I enjoyed quite a lot until I was bunged up in an accident at 20. so I have to listen to what it wants and can't achieve every day, hour to hour. it's a f@cking drag.<BR/><BR/>there is no escape from the limitations of one's body - sooner or later, for good or ill, everyone will be made aware of this. how you choose to work with it is all the say you get. and it helps to work with rather than against, and play your strengths. that goes for most things, don't it?<BR/><BR/>listen to everyone, then tell them to shut up (nicely), make your own mind up, and enjoy your life. advice is always welcome, but then advice becomes nag, and that's never welcome. at what point kind words + advice = nag is always up to the individual.<BR/><BR/>man, how drab and depressing that sounds! it wasn't actually meant to be a Marvin Moment - I guess it was just a musing on reality. reality is something we all have to deal with. doesn't mean there isn't also a sh!tload of joy in it as well :)worldpeace and a speedboathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00735857941964784431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165818820775252052006-12-11T17:33:00.000+11:002006-12-11T17:33:00.000+11:00Glad to hear you got a good doctor, and that you'r...Glad to hear you got a good doctor, and that you're on the improve. It seems to me that we spend a lot of time and energy trying not to get pregnant at the time when our bodies are ready (when we're 20ish) and just as much dealing with the later pregnancy/infertility when our minds are ready.<BR/><BR/>If it's any consolation, pregnancy at 28 hasn't been a walk in the park, and I've been totally knackered for most of it. Some of us are just a bit unlucky. My Mum had my younger sister at 36, she remembers looking at her running around the room touching everything, having my older brother (who was then 13) playing trumpet in the next room, and me (age 10) making some other demand, and thinking "That fourth kid is definitely not going to happen". An aunt tells me she realised she was too old for playgroup, and stopped at four kids. The point is that even for women who have babies realatively easily, knowing when to stop, and when is 'too old' is there for everyone. I hope making that decision isn't too rough on you for too long.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165803973531974202006-12-11T13:26:00.000+11:002006-12-11T13:26:00.000+11:00A lot of sleep, a shower, a few nice chockies, and...<I>A lot of sleep, a shower, a few nice chockies, and I feel like a new woman</I><BR/><BR/>Me too! I'll take a blonde this time. <BR/><BR/>Beyond unsaid Hallmark trite thoughts...best wishes.peacayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03997731249622552311noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165778313408595752006-12-11T06:18:00.000+11:002006-12-11T06:18:00.000+11:00Honestly, I've lost track of the times I've though...Honestly, I've lost track of the times I've thought to myself "Thank gawd I'm not a woman". I've watched MrsB go through the pain of unsuccessful IVF cycles, hormone treatments, and the ever popular game of 'When will the period kick in'.<BR/><BR/>I'll keep the stream of positive thoughts heading your way :)Boysenberryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11885757182576294587noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165742015823604082006-12-10T20:13:00.000+11:002006-12-10T20:13:00.000+11:00Duck,I'm sorry for the emotional & physical pain y...Duck,<BR/><BR/>I'm sorry for the emotional & physical pain you are going through. I had to make a similiar decision and regardless of all other input positive or otherwise - it ends up being all your own. I'm sure that you will make the right decision (or find your way to acceptance of a decision made for you) - best wishes and cyberhugs.Bluehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07537206000218742156noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165731550661628102006-12-10T17:19:00.000+11:002006-12-10T17:19:00.000+11:00Gosh, Jahteh, I'm surprised they allowed you to ma...Gosh, Jahteh, I'm surprised they allowed you to make such a choice for yourself. My experience of doctors is that they think every woman doesn't know her own mind on that subject until well after menopause. You must be a very persuasive woman!Ampersand Duckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12245377686193859488noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165729153258541482006-12-10T16:39:00.000+11:002006-12-10T16:39:00.000+11:00Stupid IE7 just ate my comment.I agree with you ab...Stupid IE7 just ate my comment.<BR/>I agree with you about the people posse. They came out of the woodwork when I decided to have a tubal ligation at 24. One, a male, said I'd only be half a woman if I went through with it.<BR/><BR/>My only regret is that with the technology today, I could have donated tubes, eggs and anything else to women who needed them but it was 'in your dreams' back then.JahTehhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02007730071564639411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165715062346887922006-12-10T12:44:00.000+11:002006-12-10T12:44:00.000+11:00Great posts, A Duck. I don't know what to say wit...Great posts, A Duck. I don't know what to say without sounding naff, but thanks for sharing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165712722726993622006-12-10T12:05:00.000+11:002006-12-10T12:05:00.000+11:00It's not over yet, Suse, so I'm happy for good vib...It's not over yet, Suse, so I'm happy for good vibes at any time. Once the pain and bleeding has gone away I'll be a lot happier. Thanks Mindy, and everyone else.Ampersand Duckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12245377686193859488noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165705383024658082006-12-10T10:03:00.000+11:002006-12-10T10:03:00.000+11:00Anyone that thinks that they can put off having ch...<I> Anyone that thinks that they can put off having children until they're ready has to really think hard about the risks. After 35, the risks increase dramatically. (This message is not sponsored by the Federal Government.) Old eggs, old body, tired mind. If you have kids after 40, expect to do everything the HARD way.</I><BR/><BR/>Any future Virginia Hauseggers, if you're reading this...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165668700431806942006-12-09T23:51:00.000+11:002006-12-09T23:51:00.000+11:00Aw shit, I'm so sorry. I catch up with your blog ...Aw shit, I'm so sorry. I catch up with your blog about once a week but don't often comment, and now I wish I'd dropped in earlier in the week and been in time to send blessings and good internetty vibes up your way.<BR/><BR/>Sending them now anyway.Susehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14837796439737091649noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165653298131979612006-12-09T19:34:00.000+11:002006-12-09T19:34:00.000+11:00These things have a way of working themselves out,...These things have a way of working themselves out, moreso the more you concentrate on something else I have found (she's asleep right now). Just know that your internet friends (sounds like invisible friends!) are here for you no matter which path you choose, or chooses you. And sometimes families just have to be told to get nicked.Mindyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10634135486127575735noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165636019905180192006-12-09T14:46:00.000+11:002006-12-09T14:46:00.000+11:00Ah, Jahteh, I am WELL aware of the lovely life I l...Ah, Jahteh, I am WELL aware of the lovely life I lead, and would be very content with my family unit the way it is; much of my questioning and railing is, I suppose, really at the posse of people who constantly defend Best Beloved's right to have his own child, even though he assures me that he could live happily this way as well. I have a lot of easily triggered guilt, and it's never as raw as on occasions like this. <BR/><BR/>The haircut? nah, I just fell in love with my emerging grey hairs, and couldn't be arsed trying to cover them up for the rest of my life. Freaks my friends out, but I'm happy.<BR/><BR/>Actually, Crit, I quite like that idea (in a purely theoretical way, of course).<BR/><BR/>Seepi, if it's right for you, go nuts. I don't want to influence anyone against older motherhood. Just venting my own spleen...<BR/><BR/>Thanks, Fyodor. But I am very curious... do you own the book? Have you merely read the poem? Are you related to Ian? I'm fairly sure you're not Ian... hmmm. I hate mysteries :)Ampersand Duckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12245377686193859488noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165629262425245492006-12-09T12:54:00.000+11:002006-12-09T12:54:00.000+11:00Big questions.No answers here.I went through a lot...Big questions.<BR/>No answers here.<BR/><BR/>I went through a lot to get one baby. Now my libran mind is wondering whether to go through it all again (only older), or to be happy with one.<BR/><BR/>Your family sounds lovely.<BR/><BR/>seepiAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165615312185533072006-12-09T09:01:00.000+11:002006-12-09T09:01:00.000+11:00That "who should be allowed to have babies" questi...That "who should be allowed to have babies" question is one that is close to my Beloved's heart. He would like the govt to legislate that people be sterilised at birth, and then those who want to procreate have to write an essay detailing all their reasons for wanting to have their reproductive organs turned on again. Kinda cute, but not very practical.Mummy/Crithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08353892248492164501noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165612041996307852006-12-09T08:07:00.000+11:002006-12-09T08:07:00.000+11:00That's an amazing well of resilience you've got th...That's an amazing well of resilience you've got there.<BR/><BR/>I've been absent from teh interwebs for a little while so missed the opportunity to add my positive thoughts to everyone elses.<BR/><BR/>Well I'll just send them to you now anyway.comicstripherohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05160377451440156332noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165587007755277372006-12-09T01:10:00.000+11:002006-12-09T01:10:00.000+11:00You have a lovely husband and a beautiful boy plus...You have a lovely husband and a beautiful boy plus brains so perhaps anything else would have been sprinkles on the icing of your cake. That's not to say I don't feel for you and what you've been through. Just curious, was this the decision for the haircut?JahTehhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02007730071564639411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165580872511089022006-12-08T23:27:00.000+11:002006-12-08T23:27:00.000+11:00Bodies. Meh. There is some sense in thinking that ...Bodies. Meh. <BR/><BR/>There is some sense in thinking that one should make hay while the sun shines. Or at least faintly glints ... but then, who knows if you'll really regret it if you don't and make lovely books instead?<BR/><BR/>Life just is what it is. No point trying to think we can control it or choose. <BR/><BR/>Sorry, am to zen (read pished) by half and am going to bed.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8632542.post-1165575629283243302006-12-08T22:00:00.000+11:002006-12-08T22:00:00.000+11:00I hope it was a good something to think about, Duc...I hope it was a <I>good</I> something to think about, Ducky. That was the intention. Very glad for you that it went well.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com